I am thinking about gratitude tonight.
I am grateful for Biscuit needing to go outside. I am grateful for the stillness outside. The beautiful covering of snow everywhere.
I am grateful that Hall and Oates exist. I am grateful for the way their music grabs me. I am grateful for the spirit that comes over me when I find myself dancing throughout the apartment while listening to Sara Smile. I am grateful that spirit grabs me and gets me out of the heightened pain I’ve been in lately.
I am grateful for getting out today and playing Bingo, which I always enjoy.
I’m grateful for the warm, fuzzy, cuckoo love Biscuit and CoCo show me daily.
I am grateful for the clarity to see that I DO have much to be grateful for. A roof over my head. Heat. Food. A good bed. An electric blanket. (BestThingEver!) Grateful for my internet access.
And I am grateful that I am not lost in depression and sadness in this moment. There is sadness in my heart. Unresolved issues. Fears. Vulnerability. But in THIS moment, I can feel those things without having them slam me down like a huge ocean wave.
I wonder where I got my “funk” from. My dancing self. My need to snap my fingers, close my eyes, wiggle my body to the beat of what moves me. As I get to know my biological Mom better, I believe I may get that from her. And that, the discovering, is a beautiful thing.
I give thanks to the support I have in my life. I give thanks for AlAnon where I learned there is no problem too great to be lessened and that I don’t have to do this on my own. I am grateful I can hear and listen to music. That I can snap my fingers and bounce my feet around. (for a SHORT amount of time!) I am grateful for this borrowed laptop I am typing on. I am grateful my experiences can help others.
I am grateful for Hope. And grateful for YouTube!